Opening the Door to Grief

This morning I attended the funeral of a dear friend of mine who died of breast cancer this week. The sanctuary was filled to capacity, overflowing in fact, and the service was exquisitely honest and heartfelt, integrating the beautiful Jewish prayers of mourning with stories of her life and music. The Threshold Choir was there too; she had been singing with them for a few years, singing to people who are coping with illness or dying. Today it was her turn to receive the gift. 

A few of her friends also sang a song from the show "Wicked" that she had loved, and before they'd even finished the first verse, you could hear the chorus of weeping around the room. The door to grief had opened and we were all walking through together, singing as we walked. LIke the Mourner's Kaddish, the lyrics of the song are themselves a prayer of gratitude and transformation.  "For Good" is not only relevant for those who are mourning; it is also a simple yet gorgeous tribute to anyone who's touched our lives in extraordinary ways.

All of my ghosts and angels were with me today, and my heart was breaking open again. 

FOR GOOD

I'm limited 

Just look at me – I'm limited 

And just look at you 

You can do all I couldn't do, Glinda 

So now it's up to you 

For both of us – now it's up to you… 


I've heard it said 

That people come into our lives for a reason 

Bringing something we must learn 

And we are led 

To those who help us most to grow 

If we let them 

And we help them in return 

Well, I don't know if I believe that's true 

But I know I'm who I am today 

Because I knew you… 


Like a comet pulled from orbit 

As it passes a sun 

Like a stream that meets a boulder 

Halfway through the wood 

Who can say if I've been changed for the better? 

But because I knew you 

I have been changed for good 


It well may be 

That we will never meet again 

In this lifetime 

So let me say before we part 

So much of me 

Is made of what I learned from you 

You'll be with me 

Like a handprint on my heart 

And now whatever way our stories end 

I know you have re-written mine 

By being my friend… 


Like a ship blown from its mooring 

By a wind off the sea 

Like a seed dropped by a skybird 

In a distant wood 

Who can say if I've been changed for the better? 

But because I knew you 

 

Because I knew you 

I have been changed for good 


And just to clear the air 

I ask forgiveness 

For the things I've done you blame me for 


But then, I guess we know 

There's blame to share 


And none of it seems to matter anymore 


Like a comet pulled from orbit 

As it passes a sun 

Like a stream that meets a boulder 

Halfway through the wood 

 

Like a ship blown from its mooring 

By a wind off the sea 

Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood 


Who can say if I've been 

Changed for the better? 

I do believe I have been 

Changed for the better 


And because I knew you… 

Because I knew you… 

Because I knew you… 

I have been changed for good…


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