Holding on and Letting Go

Recently I read this blogpost shared by grief care specialist Megan Devine in which she is interviewed about the emotions held and reflected in the belongings of those loved ones who have died.

I was reminded of a pair of gold oxford shoes my beloved aunt of blessed memory, affectionately known by many monikers so I’ll simply share one of them here: Kiki. Kiki loved shoes and she often painted them gold to suit her fancy. Literally. She had sent this particular pair to me years before she died, and I kept them even though they weren’t particularly comfortable.

A few years ago, I took them to the art studio and sanctified them with pieces of sacred text. I texted her photos of the holy transformation and she was utterly delighted. What were once plain pedestrian lace up shoes had been zhuzhed not once, but twice.

Kiki died last year, and her death has left a huge glittery gold hole in my heart. I think I’ll wear those shoes today to feel her loving presence with me. Souls and soles.

May her memory be for a zhuzhy blessing always.